I stood at our kitchen sink, cleaning away scuzz from repairing a bathroom sink. I was tired at the end of the day, wishing the repair project was done so that I could be in bed. My mind wandered to what was coming next. Tonight had been a ministry night at church, which I had greatly enjoyed. Tomorrow night, would also be a ministry night at church. And the night after that would also be a ministry night at church. My first reaction? It’s not what I wanted.
How can this be? These ministries are good; They are opportunities for God’s Word to transform each of us to be more like Christ. And yet, I was craving something else.
Praying over my internal conflict the next morning, I pushed myself to identify what I was wanting so very much: I want an easy life. The vision specifically is that all tasks and problems are tidily taken care of, my kids are quiet and content, and so I can be next to my wife and read.
At the heart of this challenge is … my heart. My flesh wants an easy life. I love the idea of comfort. But is this my highest ideal, my greatest good?
I have four prayers for this year, and many of them touch on a desire for greater, deeper love. The key aspect of love isn’t emotion. It’s sacrifice. To love means I sacrifice myself for the benefit of another without any expectation of return, repayment, or recognition. So, love means I sacrifice my comfort, my preferences in order to serve someone else.
As my thoughts return to the tasks and events before me, and my wish for the easy, comfortable life – I have to confront myself. I have to repeat the Gospel to myself. I no longer live for myself, but for the one who loved me so much, that He died and rose again on my behalf. Because the only remedy I have to overcome my natural desires for comfort is to focus on the greater truth of His love for me and His salvation of me.